A Psalm of Integration

O God, you are my refuge and my source. Who can compare with you?

You are unchanging and ever present and I bless your holy name.

I have seen the beauty of your handiwork

in swift sunsets over the African savannah,

in the delicate cherry blossoms of a Japanese spring,

in the fragrant evergreen forests of Oregon,

in lonely, windswept stretches of Portuguese coastline,

and now in the majestic Andes mountains of Ecuador,

and I open my mouth to speak your praises.

You have blessed me in my being with my sisters this week and soothed my spirit through your love.

You have helped me to

laugh with new friends,

to be vulnerable, even when it was painful,

and to rest, truly rest, in your presence.

I want to praise you with my life, serve you with my whole being, but I am weak and needy.

Forgive me when I resist your call on my life, and give me the courage and the strength to open my heart yet again to a new home, a new people, a new language, a new ministry.

I submit to your loving hand and offer you all my sweet memories, all my unresolved grief, all my paralyzing fears, all my unfulfilled dreams, and all my aching longings…

Because you alone can integrate all the disjointed parts of my life, weaving them into a one-piece tapestry, and making me whole again.

— written at the CCC Conference in Brazil, October, 2012


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